!Free Epub ☨ Gert Garibaldi's Rants and Raves: One Butt Cheek at a Time ♞ PDF or E-pub free

!Free Epub ♺ Gert Garibaldi's Rants and Raves: One Butt Cheek at a Time ⚑ GERT GARIBALDI ISN T ONE OF Those People Who Believe High School Is The Best Part Of Life She Has A Whole Notebook Full Of Rants About High School, And She S Fully Aware Of How Ridiculous The Experience Is, Thank You Very Much Gert Just Wants To Survive The Next Three Years, One Butt Cheek At A Time, With Her Best Friend, Adam, By Her Side And Maybe Luscious Luke Attached To Her Lips With A Stapler Or Something But Muddling Through Isn T Even As Easy As It Seems There Are Geriatric Parents To Deal With, Homecoming Festivities Admit It, Those Words Just Sent A Little Chill Down Your Spine , Crushes, Ed Both Sex And Driving , And Potential New Boyfriends For Both Gert And Adam Frank, Funny, And Totally Unique, Gert S Ready To Pull On The Pants Of Life And Start Dancing From The Hardcover Edition This book is really good, and presents high school through fair eyes The way that Gert describes high school and the people in it is extremely realistic Gert is extremely opinionated and not afraid to show it It s a really good and realistic book that teenagers should definitely read. Lisa CampbellHumorGert is trying to get through high school one day at a time Her best friend, Adam, is busy with his secret romance with Tim Gert is busy daydreaming about Tim s twin Lucas All the while she is trying to figure out how to be a girl, how to get through driver s education and where she fits in with the other groups in school the Pops, Giggles, Brains and Wannabes In the private world of her journal she shares her secret thoughts, hopes and rants about the things that bug her such as her geriatric parents In the end she finds that friends and boyfriends can be found in the most unexpected places.I found this book to be mildly amusing and imminently forgettable This is the kind of book a teen could take on a trip to the beach It does not tax the mind too much but is entertaining enough to not suffer greatly from many distractions I found the Tangent Sorry convention in the book distracting and slightly annoying This book would appeal to a teen girl who would identify with Gert s hopes and fears. This was an amazing book I had some great laughs I would recommend this book to all teens There are somethings some might not approve of, but it got me laughing as she described them This a wonderful book Now I just wish there was a 2nd book hint, hint. Reviewed by Sally Kruger, aka Readingjunky for TeensReadToo.comThe fun definitely doesn t stop with the title ONE BUTT CHEEK AT A TIME is hilarious from cover to cover Gertrude Gert Garibaldi is fifteen She was born when her only other sibling, a brother, was starting college She asks herself everyday why she was blessed cursed with ancient parents From her out of touch parents to her Hello, Kitty bedspread and fuzzy pink phone, Gert feels she hasquestions about her place in the social scene than there are answers Adam is Gert s best friend He has a crush on Tim, and Gert has a crush on Lucas, Tim s gorgeous twin brother Unfortunately, Gert seesof Tim when she acts as chaperone whenever Adam and Tim decide to venture out Her heartthrob, Lucas, doesn t even seem to know she exists Gert s social situation does improve when Stephen reveals his interest Thanks to Stephen, Gert attends the homecoming dance, actually dances, and has her first kiss Author Amber Kizer provides entertainment beginning on page one Imagine a driver s ed teacher who uses a walker and needs a portable oxygen supply to survive the experience Picture a principal who decides each student s weight should be recorded and graded on report cards Add to that a group project with one partner who is Gert s sworn enemy and a sex ed teacher who has everyone exploring where no one has dared to go before Have fun reading this one, but be careful when and where you read it Laughing out loud is sometimes frowned upon. Though it s been 20 years since I turned 16 Amber Kizer took me right back there with her wonderful character Gert.Gert tackles life with her own philosophy of One Butt Cheek at a Time The reason for this phiolosophy is explained in the book and makes a weird kind of sense Each chapter is started with a rant or a rave which is a tie in to the main topic of that chapter.Gert came as a surprise late in her parents life and they are tired It s not that they don t love her but they ve been there and done that For instance they agree to buy her a car because they are too tired to drive her to work but she has to get a job to pay for gas and insurance She has a gay bestfriend who is dating a Jock secretly of course and that has its own complications She has a crush on the Jocks brother that seemingly is going nowhere and a small group of friends through her bestfriend Adam She s dealing with keeping up her grades, passing her drivers test and not being such a loner Things that most teens deal with everyday.This is one of those books that proves that we are all uniquely average That everyone is good at something and special in their own way without being preachy or demeaning It s funny and true and identifiable.This book could be to kids today what Are You ThereGod It s Me Margaret, and Forever both by Judy Blume were to me and many others Although both of those books are still around and popular One Butt Cheek uses modern terms and addresses social issues that teens today are faced with Having said that it too is a timeless tale It s a book I will be giving to my nieces I highly recommende it for girls 14 and up Be warned it is blunt and even graphic in some of the sex talk though I did not find it to be crude A good place to open discussion about the facts of sex and what being a woman entails.I can t wait to see what the future holds for Gert and her friends. Read this one a while back so my memory s a bit foggy.One Butt Cheek at a TimeI thought this book was pretty okay A quick, light, fun read but not oooh awesome It did make me laugh out loud in many parts though gotta give Kizer that DGert is a freshman in high school and she is just trying to get by and get it over with hopefully in one peace and one butt cheek at at time instead of one step at a time you know She writes in this diary cute cover about all the crud she has to deal with.I thought this book was very funny and unique and just plain bold at times because a lot of the things Gert goes through everyone goes through so it s quite easy to relate to it The reason why I gave it a 3.5 instead of anything higher is because the story was just not that interesting It was just okay, a C, mediocre, ehh But it was very fun to read about the goings on in her life mainly because it was soo funny though D This is one of those books you want to check out of the library not necessarily buy.Apparently there will be a sequel I am definitely looking forward to it, I might just check it out of the library though It s just one of those books, enjoyable but not so much that I d spend what little money I have on it.Then again, I know some people would enjoy this muchthan me but maybe if they re younger like 14 16 I know I m letting my little 13 year old cousin borrow it in a year since she d love it and find it hilarious too. this book was absent of plot i might compare it to reading a blog 15 year old gert her parents are ever so slightly elderly rambles along about her best friend adam and his new boyfriend tim and tim s hot twin brother lucas, and every once in a while takes a break to rant on a subject of her choosing high school SATS sex ed etc these kind of random blog diary musings work great for louise rennison s georgia nicolson series, because they are side splitting but gert was only a tiny bit funny every once in a while she even says that the reason she is writing down her rants is because adam can t stand listening to her well, gert, if you are too boring for your best friend, how am i supposed to pay attention just when i sort of gained interest in gert s foray into masturbation and kizer does get kudos for touching on a taboo subject and her relationship with stephen the bland kisser, the book ends in a random spot so there s room for a sequel but i will not be reading it. Just under a 4.The Gert Garibaldi s Rants and Raves series is what I imagine the Georgia Nicolson series to be like sorta There s a frenetic smart energy to it, and a frankness that will strongly appeal to some readers and strongly turn off others And I do mean strongly turn off I wouldn t be surprised to hear about a parent reading this and pitching a fit, and calling for a banning I m not going to lie, it was a bit of a slow starter for me Gert is funny in the beginning and all, but she s sort of funny in that too much, enough already way And she s got a decided bitter streak which, coupled with some whininess, was off putting for me I didn t really connect to her as much in the beginning and she was starting to actually get on my nerves and make me doubt I wanted to finish when suddenly something changed It s hard to explain without giving things away, but it s sort of like Gert is at that dreaded teenager stage where you haven t really come into your own yet, or even realized that it was a possibility, but you can t let the sharks scent blood in the water so you fake it, and mask it with this extreme nonchalance that borrows a bit from Asshole Land We ve all been there, we all go through it, but once you are through it, you don t necessarily want to revisit it.Gert s got a lot of scorn, but much of it is borne from having a lot of questions She s a little oblivious to her world and the reality of who she is and she s completely oblivious to the fact that she may be oblivious she thinks she s got it all pegged , so when things start changing and she has to open her eyes a bit and risk putting herself out there, she becomes muchlikable She still keeps her biting wit, but it becomesuniversally funny and less whiny Gert started opening up and growing, and I thoroughly enjoyed the book from then on What really made it likable though was how unabashed Gert is Part of it may be that she s still a little bit clueless, but part of it is this really fun mix of eagerness, curiosity, dubiousness and naivet She asks all of the questions that you wanted to ask but were too afraid to as a teen Her narration and her rants are frank and often hilarious I think many teens will connect to this and find their voice in Gert.Now, I mentioned above that I can see this getting some very strong negative reactions As I said, Gert is very unabashedly curious There are frank and frankly hilarious discussions of masturbation, pubic hair maintenance, homosexuality, whether or not to ignore a boy s erection at a school dance, etc Some teens may be uncomfortable having it all laid out on the table like this, and some parents will likely blow a gasket over the topics But don t kid yourself These are things that every teen thinks about They may not think it as loudly as Gert, but it s hilariously realistic Now, I m not saying you should force yourself to read it if it makes you uncomfortable And I m not saying anything is gratuitous But what it is is honest Gert reminded me a bit of Charlie from The Perks of Being a Wallflower she s not as guileless as Charlie, but she is as hilariously and innocently unfiltered I don t think most people will have a problem with this once they get to know Gert, but it does bear mentioning Also, one tiny little pet peeve of mine I haaated the font choice for the Rants sections and page numbering It was almost illegible All in all, I think you can probably tell from this review whether this is the type of book for you If it is, give Gert a chance though she may annoy you in the beginning, I promise you will grow to love her and find yourself choking on your own surprised laughter along the way. The book was about a whiny teenager It s nice though, I m having fun reading journals and diaries of teenage girls Gert Garibaldi s character is cool even if she rants a lot, I love ranting as well I also adore her personality, the wallflower kinda type.At first, I find the book quite boring There was a time that I actually tried to quit reading it because of its dullness but I still pursue reading it even so The last part was kinda interesting, yet I wont tell you what actually happened There s nothing special in Gert s life She s like everyone of us, mediocre and ordinary That s what I like about the story, it s real It happens to everyone The funny thing was, she s kinda pervert, I don t know She wants to know about sex and erection and orgasm that I really don t like to talk about But the story was really hilarious and fun to read at the same time.Yes, the book was awesome and I suggest you all to read it, it s an adventure to a teenager s life.